When Lovers Think of Birds & Bees, They Think B&Bs
The weather may be too slushy to explore the great outdoors, but it's a great time to explore your lover.
Many young couples are discovering what an older, well-heeled crowd has known for years: Bed and breakfasts are a relaxing and romantic getaway during the cold months. Consider that most B&Bs are offering off-season rates and special Valentine's Day packages, and a simple dinner-and-roses doesn't measure up.
"We're seeing a trend toward younger guests all the time," said Dan Ward, who with his wife, Nancy, owns and operates Inn on Main Street in Weaverville, NC, just outside Asheville. "It's not unusual at all for a couple grad students or younger parents to get away from the pressure for a weekend and just spend some time with each other."
The more traditional guests, the experienced inn-goers aged 40 and older who relish the personal attention and homey accommodations, still visit, of course. But even among their peers, more are trying bed and breakfasts for the first time.
"As first-time B&B participants, we were a bit nervous," related Ann Roberts of Orangeburg, SC, who visited Inn on Main Street with her husband Grady. "When we first pulled up and I saw those teenage girls (the inkeepers' daughters) going inside, I said to Grady, 'Oh my gosh, we're going to be staying in someone's house and we don't even know them.'"
"We chose the Inn on Main because we read on the Internet that Nancy was a special ed teacher. I felt a connection already. Grady was attracted to the kitchen. He likes to cook and that stove just drew him in. We felt right at home."
Paulette and Gene Dugger of the Chestnut Street Inn in Asheville shared a typical note from first-time guest Eva from Atlanta:
"Motels have their place, but when you are staying somewhere for a couple of days or longer you don't want just a bed in a box," Ward said. "At a B&B, you have a homelike atmosphere, a sense of security, lots of personal attention, and a breakfast to die for. You'll meet other travelers who share their experiences and advice on what to see and do in the area. Your innkeepers know all the best restaurants and will make reservations for you. Want to hike? They've got maps. Going skiing? They can get discounts. And if you want to be left alone, you can get all the privacy you want."
A stay at a bed and breakfast can be a bit disorienting for travelers accustomed to motels. Many B&Bs have neither in-room phones or television. This is often to insure an uninterrupted stay, but it's important to ask if you want those diversions. Almost all are totally non-smoking. Most don't welcome pets or small children, though many cater to that niche.
"I've gotten email accusing me of being an anti-family ogre because we say our place is inappropriate for small children," Ward said. "We love kids, but ours is an antique-filled older home with all the hazards and breakables that suggests. Plus, most of our guests come here to get away from their own kids for a spell. They don't want someone else's children pitching crackers across the breakfast table."
Part of each inn's charm is its quirkiness, and you may want to explore a B&B's procedures before you indulge your own. Do you want breakfast in bed? You're as likely to find inns that discourage food in the rooms as you are to find those that serve it. Are you on a low-fat diet or you hate eggs? Make sure your inn can accommodate you at breakfast.
Because first-time guests, or even seasoned B&B goers, don't always know what to expect at a particular inn, it's always a good idea to chat with the innkeepers early. Peter Marsh, who with his wife Bonnie owns the Colby House in Asheville, said he tries to put guests at ease as soon as they arrive.
"IBM taught it in sales school 37 years ago," he said. "Get them talking about a comfortable subject (usually themselves), make them smile (even if it's at your own expense) and bond. It never fails."
"Young first-timers tend to treat us like their parents, asking permission for everything from taking drinks to their room to coming in late," he said. "They quickly learn to relax."
"Some of the guests help clear the table at times. In fact we even have them stripping the bed upon leaving!" said Karen Hultin, who with her husband Jack runs the Secret Garden Bed & Breakfast in Weaverville. "If that makes them more comfortable, then that's fine. But most the time we like to remind them that they are here to be pampered for a short while and we take great pride in doing just that."
She told of one couple who seemed a bit nervous about staying at a B&B for the first time. "It turned out they were artists, and the original artwork hanging in the bed and breakfast was done by personal friends of ours was an extra for them. Before the weekend was over, we saw them enjoying the house and actually sketching each other in various settings on the property to create their Christmas cards that year," Hultin said.
"Since then, they have celebrated three anniversaries with us and we've been added to their Christmas list to receive those original cards every Christmas season!"
In years past, much of a B&B's appeal was interpersonal, a chance to mingle with interesting guests and hosts. The trend has been more toward cocooning, especially among younger guests.
"I get more requests for whirlpool tubs, in-room TV and fireplaces," said Ward. "Once couples get here, they usually join in chats on the porches or at breakfast, but their original goal often seems to be to get away from everyone except each other. We try to give them lots of privacy, but also social opportunities."
Most B&Bs offer social time in the form of evening refreshments, which normally means complimentary beer, wine and soft drinks with an appetizer. Others offer an afternoon tea. Either occasion is a good opportunity to ask your hosts about dining options and off-the-beaten-path attractions.
Submitted by Dan & Nancy Ward, Innkeepers at Inn on Main Street, Weaverville, North Carolina
"Anthony and I have never stayed in a B&B until now. What were we thinking? We just couldn't get over how truly special and wonderful the experience has been. It's nice to know that there are wonderful people (and dogs like Bentley) to make you feel right at home. The little touches make you feel extra special. Thanks for remembering my hubby's birthday and I especially enjoyed the afternoon tea. We will certainly be back!" she wrote.
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